The Eternal Story of You
I took communion this morning, and in the midst of expressing gratitude to God, I was suddenly overtaken by something I’ve known in my mind—something I teach and write about often—but this time, I sensed and felt it in my heart in a fresh way. It was the overwhelming reality of my pre-existence in the heart of God.
This truth comes straight out of Jeremiah 1, where the Father declares that He knew Jeremiah before he entered his mother’s womb. The Hebrew word for “knew” here is the same word used for the intimate knowing between husband and wife. It’s not casual or distant. It’s deep, personal, and full of purpose. It speaks of a real identity—one already known and cherished by God. And whatever God knows and declares is reality.
What is often just a beautiful theological concept suddenly became nourishment for my soul. I felt the immense desire and love of the Father. I saw the staggering beauty of my own existence as someone individually known and beloved in His eternal heart.
Between Two Infinities: Pre-Existence and Forever After
This revelation filled me like a rising cloud and then expanded, suddenly lifting me into a vision of eternity future. Somehow, I existed before time—and I will exist forever in the joyful fellowship of the Trinity.
With this vision swirling in my spirit, I saw the brief span of my earthly life as just a momentary blip between two vast oceans of divine love and timeless life. In that context, every sin, every failure, every anxiety in this life shrunk beneath the glory of His affection. Even the brokenness of the world felt small compared to the cosmic reach of His mercy. His love is truly higher, wider, longer, and deeper than the universe itself.
Much of this is beautifully unpacked in the book Into the Abyss by our friend Mo Thomas. He too had a similar experience where the Lord showed him remarkable things about eternity past and future. Here’s an excerpt from one of his conclusions from this experience:
“Beneath the layers of doubt and the shadows of the world, there lies a truth unshaken—a spark of the infinite, a soul crafted from the breath of the cosmos. You are not the struggles you bear nor the fears you hold; you are the eternal echo of a design far greater than time itself, calling you to rise into the light of who you were always meant to be.”
We throw around the phrase “identity in Christ,” but in truth, we’ve barely scratched the surface. Our true identity—sealed forever in the heart of God—is the bedrock of the Gospel. Jesus came not to create this reality, but to rescue it. To restore us to the truth of who we already were in Him.
A Divinely Timed Birth
Six years ago, the Lord stunned me with a wild, divine “coincidence” that revealed how intricately He weaves our stories together.
It was August of 2019, near my birthday, and I picked up The Great Dance by C. Baxter Kruger—a book I’d heard so much about. In it, Baxter shares his journey of awakening to the deep love of the Trinity, influenced by the early church fathers and theologians like the Torrance brothers.
But even amid theological insights, something was still missing. Then he shares this moment:
“It happened on August 16, 1987, 1:07 p.m., Sunday afternoon, Aberdeen Maternity Hospital, Aberdeen, Scotland. It was the greatest moment of my life, to that point—the birth of our firstborn, a son, James Edward Baxter Kruger.”
As I read this, my jaw dropped. That wasn’t just my birthday—it was my birth year. And not just my birth year, it was down to the very hour I was born. His firstborn son, and I—the firstborn son of my parents—were both born within the same hour. And he noted this exact time in a book I was feeling drawn to read close to my birthday.
I had to put the book down. I stood up. Sat back down. Stared in silence. I let the awe settle in.
God was kissing me with His presence. My birth was not random. Even the pain and imperfection surrounding it was not the final word (my parents would divorce within three years). My story, like yours, reaches far beyond time and chaos. It is rooted in the eternal purpose of love.
Living Beyond the Blip
When life feels like a swirl of disappointment or uncertainty, we must remember: this small blip of time is not the whole story. But if we live only from the current, small plotline, the story can be filled with anxiety and rejection. Nonetheless, the greater narrative—the one rooted in eternity—speaks of divine identity, unshakable love, and an astonishing calling.
Yet truth must drop from the head to the heart. That’s what happened for Baxter on that August afternoon in Scotland. That’s what was stirring in me afresh during communion this morning. And that’s what happens when we receive prayer, read books (or articles) that herald these realities, and take time pause and reflect throughout. It also can happen when we notice strange coincidences that refuse to be ignored.
These are invitations—holy doorways—into the true script.
From Ishmael to Intimacy: Healing the Nations with the True Story
In 2020, something else happened where God brought this truth home not just for me, but for the nations of the world.
During this time, God was dealing with certain patterns in my life where I was reacting to the world based on that shaky blip of my early life and the broken perception of abandonment and shame. At a particular moment where God affirmed that I was never once truly abandoned, I found myself on a plane surrounded by Muslim men.
Suddenly, I felt the heart of God for the descendants of Ishmael—those living under a false script of rejection. Their origin story had been distorted by human dysfunction, by Abraham’s mistakes, by fractured families. And I could relate.
I had my own “Ishmael” story—born into pain, misunderstanding, and a fragmented family. Yet, like them, I was still chosen. Still beloved. Still carried in the eternal heart of God.
It is not a stretch to say that this message, this invitation back into our divine identity, is for the world. And that’s exactly where I hope to go next.
From Divine Identity to Global Destiny
As I write this for the August issue, I’m realizing this is the same time of year that I read The Great Dance. I read it in 2019, only a few months before the world changed in 2020 and God began to do a deeper work in my own heart and calling. Today, the Spirit keeps deepening this truth in me, and now I want to connect it with God’s great plan for the nations.
Because this message is not just for individual transformation. It’s for global awakening.
In Part II, I’ll share some even wilder stories of how God is confirming this truth to the world, especially in places like Asia and Africa, where many still live under false scripts of identity and oppression. This also ties in with a promise surrounding Christ’s return and “the time of the end” mentioned in Matthew 24 and other passages.
I hope you’ll join me for the next part of this journey. And prayerfully consider what it may mean for you and your calling.
An Activation for You…
Quick note for the reader: I hope you know you were made to experience something greater than rituals.
Not all of us will have a “mountaintop moment” like Baxter did at his son’s birth. But you can have communion—right now, today—where you can allow certain truths to settle deeper into your soul.
My own experience from this morning wasn’t a supernatural vision or out-of-body encounter. It was a quiet stream of weighty thoughts that entered my heart as I simply stilled my mind and meditated on Jesus. A skeptic might say it was all imagination. But I know better. I wasn’t just performing a ritual. I was dining with the King.
As this moment unfolded, a piece of music showed up in my YouTube feed—serene, cinematic, and perfectly timed. I believe music can help elevate the soul into these realms of revelation. (Here’s the link if you’re interested.)
If you do set aside some time to sit with God, here’s another piece written by Mo Thomas that might help your heart set sail into those clouds of revelation…
You are a spark of Divine Genius,
born from the boundless vision of a Creator
who wove your essence before the stars took flight.
The pulse of your heart is the prize They seek,
for… the saga They dream for you
stretches far beyond
the limits of your
own pen.
God’s faith in you burns brighter
than the trust you place in Them,
and infinitely fiercer than the belief you hold in yourself.
Surrender to Their call.
They are vast, radiant, a Beauty
that shatters every story you’ve heard—
and you…
You are Their masterpiece,
woven from the same Eternal Light.